Trailer to “Troubles In The Garden”.   A NOTEFLIX Binge-look production.   Act 1, Scene 111, Take 22; Googie, (lower left)  side-kick to our hero, The Multicolored Blue Bird of Happiness, trembles in fear as the big, godlike Eagle has said “Do not eat of my green lemon!”   The rat, (next to Googie) has said “Go ahead, eat the thing!”.   Our hero tells Googie not to worry about any of this, for he knows:  1) The Eagle is just a big, furry, stuffed toy.  And 2) Nobody wants to eat green lemons anyway.  (To be continued.)

THOUGHTS GENERATED BY IDLE HANDS  (Reader, please beware:  The following segment is from a couple of notes which have been festering on my desk for several years.   God knows they, in no way, are meant to insult your religious or spiritual beliefs.  They are simply my meanderings – maybe some of you will relate.)

  • What if God got up and said “I’m not going to read the news anymore.  It is too depressing.  What have I wrought?”…What if?…and sure God can count every hair on your head, because God can do everything, but why would God do that? …what with 40 billion other planets that He/She made out there…and maybe things are working out better out there than they are down here…Did God have other sons on the other planets?   There could be billions of other sons out there.  No wonder God does not have much interest in reading our papers anymore.   So much to see, so much to do.
  • Corporate Man can make the blind see.  Corporate Man can make the legless walk.  Corporate Man has arrived and acts like he is the Second Coming.   A false God, with false profits.
  • There is a Doomsday cult in China which holds the Second Coming is about to arrive – and She is a woman, and She hates evil.   I’m with Her.
  • When I was a child I was told the Devil was collecting souls.  I forget if he got mine, or if I got anything in the bargain.  But now I wonder what he does with all those souls.  I’m tempted to say he put them in Congress, but that would be too flip and being flip in these times is close to evil.
  • I read that 60% of adults during WW11 were Bible Believers.  35% of today’s adults are Bible Believers.  4% of today’s youth are Bible Believers.   Is this the foretelling of anything?
  • I would like to know what the next good guess is for the End Of Times.  The last one I had read about was for 9/23/2015 – which was obviously a miscalculation.  I have read there will be a severe cocoa (chocolate) shortage by early 2020 – that could be an indicator of things falling off the cliff?


  • It takes 100 x’s your body weight in water each day to keep you in clothes, fed, and hydrated.  Lose weight!
  • The smellier the food, the less of it we eat – studies show.  I wonder if there is a  smelly spray-on product we could bring to market here. Benefits abound: Lose weight, Save water, Let other people eat the food you don’t eat because you are eating less of it.
  • Studies show when it does not rain for extended periods of time, there is less pollution in the Chesapeake Bay (less chemical and water run-off from the farmlands and such).   So, no rain is a good thing?
  • Some hot dog vendors in NYC are known to have guns.  It is enough to make the NRA weep with joy.
  • It is not conclusive; but it looks like we humans are the only animals with grandmothers.   So, God, we are good for something.  Come on back!

  A few observations to end it all:

  • “Corporations cannot commit treason, nor be outlawed nor excommunicated, for they have no souls.”  -Sir Edward Coke (Pronounced “Koch”) 1552-1634.  Our Supreme Court would have something to say about that.
  • “1.  If any man after legall conviction shall have or worship any other god, but the lord god, he shall be put to death.”  -Massachusetts Colony,  -Body of Liberties  1641.  Thank god I did not live back then, or I’d be dead for my meanderings.
  • “We know God loves baseball and he sent us Babe Ruth to prove it!”  -NYT’s headline 1920’s  “And we know He loves home runs, because He sent us steroids.  (-cem 2010)

I’ll be back in a few days, the good lord willin – and the creek don’t rise…

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