“BET MY MONEY ON THE BOB-TAILED NAG/SOMEBODY BET ON THE BAY”…

Update on NOTEFLIX’s production of ‘Troubles in the Garden”: “The Lost Episode”. During a break from our production, Mathuzala, The Wisest of All, gave a lecture to those who would attend. The topic was “How to Take Care of yourself and Live Happily”. You will note many in the audience are not paying attention to what is being said. The Multicolored Bluebird of Happiness is trying to coo with Mamzelle Pinkie. Qween Ezmiralda is looking at the camera to make sure she is the first in the photo. A baby cow (Left of crowd) is daydreaming, And some of the little critters (On the upper right) are trying to escape. All this is to say sometimes it seems no one wants to know anything, even if it is for their own good. Is this too heavy a cross for Mathuzala to bear? (Keep abreast, come back next week for more, possibly.)

…”GOING TO RUN ALL NIGHT/GOING TO RUN ALL DAY”  – Stephen Foster, “Camptown Racetrack”

Topics I used to wonder about; before the current ‘political situation’ pre-empted all thought:

  • A gallon of gas (a fossil fuel) uses up 100 tons of ancient plants.  Every day, we humans use up in oil (a fossil fuel) the equivalent of a year’s worth of our planet’s plant growth (from millions of years ago).
  • 251 miilion years ago  there was a methane burp – so big, you would not believe.  The methane from the burp has been frozen under the polar oceans and is thawing out.  This could change the compositions of the ocean’s methane hydrates – whatever they are…and it bothers me for some reason.  If only the President would leave the White House, then I can give this my proper attention.
  • It seems we are killing a lot of mammals and fish; but not spiders.  Spiders must not be good to eat.  There are over 30,000 different types of spiders and if luck continues to go their way, there will be more soon.
  • 99.9% of all species that have existed, cease to exist.  (This can’t be all our fault, can it?  Sometimes I wonder if our role here is to pave over much of the planet, fill the ocean with plastics, poison the air and fulfill the job of the “6th Great Extinction” – are the Gods changing things up? …not wanting to throw another slider into the earth, this time using us as their new tool to wipe everything off and start anew…
  • Fire ants lock legs and jaws with each other and form floating rafts when confronted with a sudden flood. Some humans loot when a flood comes.  Some of our best minds are studying how to build strong fire ant type raft structures, when what we should be studying is how to stop looting.
  • Before the 2016 ‘Primaries’ there was a study done at Harvard, ” The Good Samaritan Study”, in which all the students were too busy to participate.  The subject of the study was to learn whether students were, or were not, prone to help the homeless man on the Harvard steps. See?  Not everything was perfect before this administration did its things.
  • Studies show only 28% of the people are paying attention to the ‘Lecturer’ at any given time during a Lecture – and that 28% is constantly changing in its composition, meaning attendees come in and out throughout whatever is being presented. This explains a lot.  Sometimes I am amazed at how stupid we are (including myself) and I now realize it is because we do not pay enough attention to what is going on in front of us. (More on this over the next few hundred posts. So, pay attention!)
  • I have been binge-watching tv series’s lately and I have come to the point where I thank the good lord for the invention of Crime, otherwise it would be all Reality shows, ‘Coming of Age’ stories, and Smut Comedy, which are Crimes by another definition, I suppose..
  • There have been over 58 studies of Hot Dogs & Colorectal Cancer.  They show there are over 143,000 cases a year of colorectal cancer resulting in 50,000 deaths….and most of the patients were frequent eaters of hot dogs, other sausages, bacon, ham and processed meats.  But who will listen?  58 studies are nothing.  “Studies are Bunk!” says the meat industry, and many eaters agree.
  • I read an article about the possibility of Aliens living among us.  One of the prominent voices on this subject said, “Absence of Evidence is not evidence of absence.”  I think he is now working for the President’s legal team.  Maybe there are Aliens on the team with him.  I think there is evidence of that.

And now for lighter notes from our guest columnist, Mathuzala:

MATHUZALA SPEAKS:

“Come Hither,

  • “There are ants  on this planet numbering  more than 10 to the 24th power.  Their total weight is greater than that of all the humans and there is a bumper crop of ants coming up this year.  This does not bode well for you, or us.  Your chemicals are poisoning the waters and killing a lot of life, but not hurting the ants.  Someone else must take charge…soon.
  • “It has been told that if you do not study History, you are compelled to repeat it; but it seems those who have studied have learned nothing and we are seeing History repeat Big-time.  We cannot afford anymore of your ‘repeats’.

(Editor’s note: We are cutting Mathuzala’s article short at this point; he seems to be a bit off his meds.)

Three  quotes for your consideration:

  • “Open the pod-Bay doors, H.A.L.”  To which the pilot is answered, “I’m afraid I can’t do that.” -Stanley Kubrick,  “2001; A Space Odyssey”
  • “Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, Where have I gone wrong?”  Then a voice says to me, “This is going to take more than one night.’ -Charles Schultz, speaking through Charlie Brown in “Peanuts”
  • “Perhaps the truth depends upon a walk around the lake.” -Wallace Stevens, Thinker

(If you wish to know more about Mathuzala and his Movement, please go to: Amazon, or Barnes & Noble…then go to: Books…then go to: THE RAT PAPERS  …and Buy! Buy! Buy!)

Be careful out there,

Update on Election/Selections for the winners of the TEDDIES.  There is a problem – and we do not know how it happened; but so far in the counting of ballots The Stuffed Bird of Truth has the overwhelming lead for Favorite Creature.  The odd thing is: The Stuffed Bird of Truth has never appeared in any of our Episodes…so something must have run amuck here.  Someone is trying to discredit the validity of the votes.  We are sending our lawyers in to sue whoever we can to straighten this out.  We think Bork, the Angry Purple Slug (Seen behind the BigWhite Bear’s left paw)) might have had something to do with all this.  More next week, hopefully.

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