NOTEFLIX Productions presents a quiz: Can you find – in your reading the post below – what three (3) topics come to life this photo? (Answers to be found at bottom of today’s writings.)
“…AND I AIN’T SEEN THE SUNSHINE SINCE I DON’T KNOW WHEN.” -J.R. Cash, 1955, Singer/songwriter
Now, after The Elections, we can get back to worrying about the things we should have been worrying about before The Elections.
- ROBOTS: While you are hunkering down in your living quarters – keeping safe from the virus, ROBOTS are doing the work you could have been paid to do. And you will never take those jobs away from them. Those jobs aren’t ‘coming back’. Before the Lockdown, half the work which was being done by cashiers and salespeople was able to be done by technology, and the technology was ready to pounce. Worse, ROBOTS don’t get sick and don’t pass on the Virus and don’t want higher wages.
- CHOCOLATE: Good News at last. Studies show eating CHOCOLATE reduces age related memory loss. (I must try to remember to eat some tonight). Studies go on to say, however, you have to eat a lot of it to do any good. (Even better)
- BOOK READING: Book readers 50 years or older are 23% less likely to die in any 12 year period than non-book readers. If you read only a half hour a day, your chances to beat the illiterates goes down to 17%. You have to read at least an hour a day to get to the magical 23% figure. Newspaper reading does not count. I do not know if ‘Blogs’prolong your life. (I suspect some Blogs can make you happier during your brief stay down here.) I have not seen studies on whether watching TV makes you live longer, or gives you a predisposition towards self-harming,, or what. But do not waste your time on “Your Honor” or “On The Rocks” or any of the new Action films released during the last year. If you do, those hours lost will require you to up your reading another 120 minutes a day, simply to break even. And then with all your reading, you won’t have any time left to go out and find a job that the ROBOTS can’t do.
- LIGHTENING BULLITT ROUND: *I heard the Earth is spinning faster than it did when we first measured how fast it spun. (Should I worry? Did WE cause this, too? Will things start to fly off? Have they already?) I am reading some thinkers think Global Unemployment will be the biggest problem for humans in the near term. Then again, I read that Climate Change will be the biggest problem…Then I read the Wealth/Income disparity is really the Big Bad. (All this reading and I have not spent one minute on a book. I’m going to die early with the non-book readers, if I don’t get my act together. *Last year was the hottest year ever. (Take that, you Climate change Deniers!) *Banks who have ballparks named after them report lower Earnings Per Share than the others – and the towns those ballparks are in do less well in tax receipts, than those which do not have bank-named ballparks in them. * Prior to WW11 Japanese Americans owned/produced 40% of the crops in California. After the war, the Japanese Americans could not pay the taxes on the land – and they sold the land to the Caucasian Americans. (OMG!)
- BROKEN TOES: Doctors are reporting an upsurge in broken toes. Apparently, people are not putting on their shoes while in lockdown – and they walk around in socks, or worse, and stub their toes on the furniture – their not being used to walking around the house all day. (I am not making this stuff up.)
- SOCIALISM: I have read if you create a police force to protect your society – that is a form of Socialism. But, I have also read many police forces in the U.S. are not in favor of Socialism. (Go figure.)
- HATE: Try not to Hate. For, if you live long enough you will tend to become the thing you hated. (It is all part of the Big Laugh the gods are having on us…and the next thing you know you will become a Republican (or a Democrat, depending on which you were before you started to hate), or a Climate Change Denier, or whatever it was you hated a while back. So, do not waste your time hating…I have no suggestions yet on what you should do instead. Come back next week. Maybe I’ll have it then.
And now a few words from our guest columnist MATHUZALA:
- Studies done on my fellow rats have shown that overcrowding the population leads to horrific behavioral changes and a total collapse of the social organism. You do not want to know how bad things can get; but know this: with 7 billion of you, you are already ‘overcrowded’ – and you do not consider ‘Over-population’ as one of your major problems. Go to your library, you will not find one inch of books dealing with this subject. You have a Bible which you believe tells you to ‘Go forth and Multiply’. Wrong! Error in translation! The true meaning of the command was “Go forth and do the Math.”
- “We do not hate you. We must change you, however.”
(Editors note: What can we say? Mathuzala has his opinions. We present his thoughts in our efforts to be Fair and Balanced. If you were interested in knowing more about MATHUZALA and how he became so wise and powerful, go to Amazon, and buy “THE RAT PAPERS”
- “How high’s the Water, Mama?”/ “Five feet high and Rise’n.” J.R. Cash, once again
- ‘Classic.’ A book which people praise and don’t read.” -Mark Twain, Humorist/writer (If you spend time reading a ‘Classic’ you do not necessarily get more credit on your life-span; but it might be worth your while, anyway.)
- “The shelf life of a modern hard back… is somewhere between the milk and the yoghurt.” -Calvin Trillin, Journalist
Alert! At the same time the TEDDIES Award Ceremony is to be held next week (See previous posts for details), Bork the Angry and Fierce Purple Slug is going to try to upstage our show by announcing his own winners at his falsely contrived “The Borkies”. The worm! We will do everything possible to not let him take anything away from our happy event. Normally, we would have scheduled the local police to protect the area; but under the circumstances, we do not know whose side they are on. (Come back next week for more action.)
Answers to todays quiz.
You are correct if you thought: #1) Mortimer, (Lower right of photo) the dull-witted whatever he is – has stubbed his toe while walking around his apartment in lockdown. You can see how badly swollen his left toe is. And #2) & #3) The milk carton, the book, and the yoghurt – obviously depict the last two quotes mentioned in our Quote section above. Good work!