Update on NOTEFLIX’s production of “Troubles in the Garden”: More and more members of our cast are curiouser and curiouser not only over who or what is The Answer Man – but they want to know what he or it has to say.
Our section on INFAQs (Infrequently Asked Questions) & AFTAM (Answers From The Answer Man) returns by popular demand:
- INFAQ: “I notice that of the 37 miracles performed by Jesus, none of them had anything to do with the fixing of teeth. Does this mean people back in the day took better care of their teeth than they do today? If not, what is the significance of my finding?” AFTAM: “No” to your first question. Significance? “None”. Next question, and make this a good one, please.
- INFAQ: “If robots are going to replace human workers…who will pay all the taxes the human workers used to pay?” AFTAM: Now that is a good question. The answer is: YOU. You will pay the taxes one way or another. The Big Companies won’t pay and the Politicians won’t pay and the Wealthy (Which are soon becoming One and the Same) won’t pay either – all because that is the way the rules are written. Of course, you might not have to pay any taxes if you’ve lost your job to a robot. We’ll see. Next question?
- INFAQ: “I read a review on a book, the topic of which was on how the Romans during the Hay-day of the Roman Empire, went to the bathroom. A whole book published on how the Romans went to the bathroom. (The book got a ‘Good’ review.) My question is: What has happened to the publishing industry? and/or, to the reading public?” AFTAM: There are some things which are too hard to explain in the space permitted in this column. You are right to be concerned about what the public is reading these days considering what is happening in today’s world. If the reader wants to ‘escape’; retreating into the Roman toilet of yesteryear is hardly the place to go. There is a book out there that discusses how civilization is being taken over by rats. Now, that is a good read.
- INFAQ: “Is it true that the Large mouth Bass, who have been caught and released have baby fish which are caught less than the baby fish of those who were not caught and released?” AFTAM: You have correctly assessed the situation as it is understood today. Please do not send any more questions like this to our column.
- INFAQ: “I hear ‘Old Faithful’ is about to give it up. True or False?” AFTAM: True and False. Climatologists believe the rising temperatures will shut down “Old Faithful” within the next 70 years. But, since there are over 4 million money paying tourists who visit the site every year, it is likely a firm like Disney will figure out a way to keep the geyser gushing…make it even more fun with Mickey and Goofey dancing around the spout, no matter how hot it gets out there.
- INFAQ: “What problem, above all, keeps Americans awake at night?” AFTAM: A fine question. As you know some Americans are concerned about Climate Change, some about Inflation…others, Wealth Disparity… Racial Injustice…the list goes on. But studies show Americans are more concerned about their weight than anything else. At least there is something you can do about your weight.
And now a word from our resident columnist MATHUZALA:
- “Many of you ask silly questions which are concerned about this and that, when there is so much in this world to enjoy. You would be much happier if you stopped worrying so much and just scurried about – like we do.”
If you want to know more about MATHUZALA and determine for yourself whether he is simply a raving rodent, or on to something worthwhile, please go to Amazon or Barnes & Noble and buy “THE RAT PAPERS” and forget about losing weight.
NOTES FROM TUSCANY:
- Here is a partial list of coffees available at the caffes in our Piazza: Caffe (regular espresso), Lungo (Tall Espresso), Doppio (Double espresso) Ristretto (made with little water), Macchiato (with a spot of foam, never after a meal), Macchiatone (more foam), Marocchino (layers of cocoa and foam), Freddo (with cold milk), Americano (tall, made with a lot of water), Shakerato (shaken with ice martini type glass), Corretto (alcohol added), Decaffeinato, D’Orzo (made from barley), Ginseng, Cappuccino (…Only to be served before 11:00 as it is considered breakfast due to large amount of milk -ordering one after lunch or dinner puts a scarlet T for tourist on your shirt) Cappuccino (See photo above… Presented by Fabbio, barista) was invented over a hundred years ago when food was hard to come by. All these coffees are served in ceramic cups or glasses. A small spoon is supplied with the accompanying saucer. Coffee here is an important part of the day – not just a caffeine jolt.
- “Some books seem to have been written, not to teach us anything but to let us know the author has known something.” -Goethe
- “I have not told even half the things I have seen.” -Marco Polo
- “I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain…” -Roy Batty, Robot, “Blade Runner” (But did Batty pay us his taxes? Did he wonder about the baby fish of the uncaught? No. He wasn’t human.)
Be well. “Hello” to Gordon, wherever you are.