We are continuing our print-outs from the upcoming 2028 Republican Party’s Presidential Debate. (see last week’s posting – if you missed it – to understand what’s going on here.) The names are removed – so the reader can guess who is who. Our pollsters have kindly shared their ratings of the performances
Question from the Moderator: “What would you do in the first 30 days, if you were to win the Election?”
Candidate at Lectern #3: Of course I would hope my Boss would simply continue on as President, but in case he chose not to do so…the first thing I would do is say how sorry I am to have said the bad things I said – many years ago – about Mr. Trump. I would not pardon the people who said I said what I said.. But I would pardon my wife for being an immigrant, even though I hate immigrants, no matter what they eat, or what religion they go for… Come to think of it, I would erase all evidence of everything I ever said before I became Vice President, so the American people would become less confused than they are.
Pollster Ratings: 50% of those polled thought the candidate’s wife was better looking than he was…but did not like the fact she was not American looking and that she might not become a Christian. …”If the President dies or is removed from office due to mental reasons, does this candidate automatically become President?” …was the question most (nervously) asked about the man at Lectern #3. A lot of the male responders really liked his beard, though. Overall Rating: 5 out of 10
Candidate at Lectern #4: “The first thing I would do would be to tax the Rich. Then I would make the cross-town busses cheaper and faster. Then I’d deal with housing affordability… and then…”
Pollster Ratings. OOOPS! So Sorry!! We mistakingly entered a print-out from the NYC mayor’s debate. Our polls reveal – the viewers liked this candidate very much. Also, the men who liked the beard on the man on Lectern #3…did not like the beard on the Democrat Mayoral candidate. Overall rating: 8 out if 10
More next week. And Goodnight to Mrs. Calabash and “Hello” to Chris P
